This is a little unusual, because it’s just me in this episode. I've never really felt the need or the reason to record a solo episode, and I don't want to be somebody that just pontificates about my own lessons in life and blahdy-blah. I really want to talk about and with other women and other people doing modalities that raise us all up, bring us to our highest selves and all that good stuff.
That's really the premise of what I'm doing, but this episode is an exception. After scrubbing some toilets to deal with my sadness, frustration, embarrassment, and feeding all the farm animals. I'm jumping on the microphone.
Here we go. Today, I basically got my ass handed to me. I set up a pre-call with a woman who has written a book. And truth be told, I thought I had at least browsed through this book. I believe it's down in my library in my husband's bookcase, along with all the other business books. When I saw this author on a webinar, I heard her story. I thought she's gonna be perfect for the Second Wind, I would love to learn her story.
So I sent her an email, just like I do everyone else. And she was great! She replied, and we set up a pre-call for today. I'd already been a little bit late to get on the call, because I had a few things go awry. She was super sweet about it.
We started talking, and I told her the premise of my podcast. I have conversations with women with no preconceived notions or ideas, or much of anything else. I get to know them, I'm asking the how's and the why’s. Who they are, what brought them to where they are, etc. I think that's super interesting, and there's things to learn along that journey. And that includes going back to when you were growing up. Choices you made, things that were going on in your life, the who's, the what's, the where's, all that.
I don't necessarily always know about the person I'm interviewing, I kind of go in with a blank slate, and that's why I do my pre-calls. The pre-call is for me to take notes and to ask questions and to connect the dots. We usually end up being friends by the end of the call, except for today.
So we got going with the pre-call, I explained the premise and why I do what I do. And she's all about it. She thinks it's great! I'm on the right track. So I started asking about when she decided she was going to write this book. The conversation ended up going in circles, and there was no pinpointing of the time when she decided to write her book.
So I was like, let's talk about who you are, how did you grow up and write? Then you could feel the dynamic and the vibe change. She really was like, “I don't understand why that's important. I really just want to share about my book, and all the lessons in my book, everything's in my book, everything I've done, I share it all in the book”. I said, “well, I don't really want to share your book for all of what it says, but more share the person and then have people go get the book”.
That did not go well at all... It was obvious I hadn't read the book. I thought I read it, but I didn't remember any of it, so I said I probably need to revisit and read it. At that point, I offended her. I definitely offended her.
She told me about her accomplishments, which are amazing and really cool. But that wasn't important to me, what was important to me to share with you all was the person and why she wrote the book, and what it did for her and the lessons learned in writing the book. Where she ended up with the book and the business, that's the icing on the cake.
That's what I want to get to in my interviews. So once this happened, I decided I'm going to pull back, I don't want to be part of this. I apologized, I certainly did not mean to offend her. I'm going to read the book. I love all the things this woman has done and stands for.
I asked if she’d think maybe in the future, after I read the book and everything, would she mind if we revisited? And she said ‘absolutely not’. And that was the end of that. I ended the phone call feeling embarrassed, upset, ashamed. I tried not to cry and just felt really horrible. I asked myself: who am I to interview this important person, who has accomplished so much?
It was a little bit of imposter syndrome, and it made me start looking at my list of people I have coming up on the podcast. All of these people have said yes to the pre calls and yes to the interviews. I asked myself ‘are they too big for me? Are they too important to want to share their story?’
The lesson I learned would be that as the podcast grows, I have to pay attention. I need to dot my i's and cross my t’s, and really learn a little bit more before I go into these interviews. Ignorance is bliss, but it's still ignorance, right? So do your homework. I don't think I'm going to change the fact that I want to share the person and their journey. Whether you make six times what you were making, or you make less if you're living your true self, your alignment, what lights your soul up, and your heart up and you feel purpose. All that other stuff just kind of falls in place.
What I want to share with my Second Wind podcasters is: allow for growth, allow for the yucky feelings. Don't be surprised that as you go along and you're doing what you need to do, you're going to have times when you're going to have to re-evaluate. But keep pushing forward, no matter how yucky you feel, and how much you want to cry and feel sorry for yourself.
I'm going to keep reaching out to people that I think have amazing stories to share with you. I'm just going to be better at being prepared.
Do you want to make sure you never miss a new episode of Second Wind?